Friday, 7 June 2013

Top Tips For Managing Feelings of Intense Anger

Anger is a natural reaction to a specific situation. We are all instinctively hardwired to respond aggressively to a perceived or real threat. Anger may be healthy or even crucial for an individual's well-being in some situations, yet it becomes detrimental if it grows into an unmanageable rage. It then takes control of our lives, hurting the people around us. According to research, one out of every five persons has anger management issues. These individuals struggle with abnormally repressed or expressed anger, leading to severe emotional and physical implications.

Anger causes us to act dangerously as we are likely to not think clearly as we speak or react. Most people later regret whatever they said or did while they were going through their feelings of intense anger. Anger can make you hurt others or even yourself emotionally or physically. People may start avoiding you or even feel fearful of you, leading to feelings of isolation, loneliness or even depression. Uncontrollable rage and anger cause poor decision-making and adds further complications to your life.

To start your anger management process, the best strategy is to start recognizing the early signs of anger within you. These signs could be physical or emotional changes that you might observe as you start feeling angry. You may feel your muscles tense up, such as a tightening sensation in your shoulders or instinctive fist or jaw clenching. Your face may start feeling flushed or hot and your heartbeat may start beating more rapidly. Some people feel knots in their stomach, while others get headaches or start pacing. There may be feelings of impatience, sadness, irritation or being weighed down.
Some people have innate patterns of thinking typical to their family, making them increasingly prone to anger. Several very angry people have the tendency to blame others for their troubles. Others take things very personally, believing that everyone else is after them. Another type becomes angry over mundane issues like being lost or the traffic.

Start by prioritizing the significant issues over the trivial ones and deal with them accordingly. To manage your feelings of intense anger, out of these very effective strategies, you need to find the ones that work for you.
The first step is to accept the fact that you have the strength to control your anger. This control is essentially a skill that improves with practice. Realizing that ups and downs are very normal will enable you to understand that it is acceptable to feel anger when something goes wrong. Focus on the positives in your life and do something that relaxes you. Breathing deeply and slowly works for almost everyone.

Stop yourself from saying or doing the first instinctive thing that comes to the mind and instead, count to ten. This brief wait will let you think about how others' feelings will be affected by your reaction. Think about leaving or at least taking a break and come back after you feel more in control of your anger. Make advance contingency plans for how you will react if you find yourself in irritating circumstances.
Listen to others with open-mindedness. Perhaps you have preconceived notions about what others say since you haven't been listening carefully. Try to explain your perspective very calmly, even if you find it tiresome. Develop your own constructive anger management methods, such as listening to music, a run, talking to a friend or perhaps writing a journal.

When you find yourself achieving even the slightest level of success at managing your intense anger, appreciate yourself. Move further ahead in the process and identify the circumstances where you are able to manage your emotions and the ones where your anger takes over. This will be your powerful tool that will grow as you achieve more and more success in your anger management.
Semee S. Qureshi is a freelance article writer with a diverse range of interests and experiences.

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